How First Sucks

Ever remembered your first crush? Your first date, first kiss, first I love you and the entire first in your life? This entire first in your life can be so unforgettable and memorable. And how about your first heartache and your first baby? Let me tell you my friend’s story.

She met this guy at work whom she never expected to fall in love with. Why? Because he wasn't the ideal man she wants. But weeks later, she felt something towards this guy and her only reason of falling for is because the guy is so caring and thoughtful. He would always accompany her during lunch and dinner, bring her food during work, fetches her after work and spends more time with her. At first she was ignoring the guy knowing the guy is committed to another girl but as months passed, this not-so-cute guy turned to be his ideal man unexpectedly. Simply because of what he’s been showing to her. How thoughtful and sweet he was. Every girl would want a man like that huh?

Months passed and their friendship bloomed to romance as the guy told her that her girl already broke up with him. But Lila my friend was there to comfort and understand him through the break up process and all the pain it left the guy. And so they've decided to be together. They were both so happy in the relationship. They spend so much time together, eat together, and always make everyday memorable.

It was almost their first anniversary they found out she was pregnant. Unprepared but happy to know they’ll be having their baby soon. Lila wasn't actually ready to be pregnant since she’s sick and the doctors told her she could die if she’ll continue the child. But too eager to raise the baby, she didn't think of what may happen to her, she continued the pregnancy even the guy told him not to since it was the doctor’s recommendation. Since then, they fought a lot. They've been fighting because Lila would really want to continue the baby but the guy wont – afraid he would lose her after giving birth.

It’s almost nine months of Lila’s pregnancy when she found out her boyfriend and her ex-girlfriend got back together. Her world almost crashed when she heard about this. She couldn't do anything but cry. She weeps at night, she barely eat. She hid her tears and tried to be strong not for her but for the baby as well. It was just so painful for her since it was her first heartache. And the fact that she’s pregnant, she never expected the guy would cheat on her. She believes things happen for a reason – she just don’t understand what the reason could be. I mean their relationship was quite perfect, they seldom fight, and they loved each other so much. Even I couldn't understand why this had to happen.

Lila who've been in so much pain was brought to the hospital before her due date. She gave birth 2 weeks earlier than the expected delivery date. The guy came to see her and the baby. He was even crying when he talked to her asking for forgiveness. Lila still loves him so much but she thinks it’s better to just end everything so the pain couldn't hurt her deeper.

Until now, they haven’t got back together. Lila wanted the guy to suffer the way she did. She wanted him to realize her worth and that she have all the right to keep her baby away from him if he’s not gonna change. Good thing is, the guy made every single effort he can to show how sorry he is for hurting her.

First heartache really sucks. It can break and make you. We all know it’s not easy and it will never be to go through the healing process after a hurtful heartbreak. All we can do is be strong and learn to love ourselves more than how much we can love others. Though we cannot stop ourselves from loving someone too much, we are still responsible for ourselves.

Love but with limitations even if the person is our ideal man.

My GrownUp Christmas List

Men and women, young or old, we all have our own different wishes every Christmas. Toys, clothes, candies for kids. But for grownups, we already know that this stuff isn’t that important. Merely half of billions of people around the world have the same Christmas wish – and that’s to have a better life, a stable job, a happy relationship with your partner, and a strong family bond.

When we were young, we’re happy to receive toys from our godparents and family. To think it’s enough to make kids happy. Well it is, since kids don’t know yet the meaning of true happiness coz chocolates, candies and toys are enough to make them happy. Though not every child is. Only child from several families would also wish for a longer family bonding, more time to spend with their parents since their parents aren’t always at home and is busy with their professions.

When we grow up, we have a deeper understanding what true happiness is. We can find happiness everywhere but true happiness is hard to find. And I think it’s the most used Christmas wish every year. J I mean who wouldn’t want to feel completely happy, right? Though we can find it from our family, friends and relatives, some of us may still feel incomplete. Especially during holiday season where almost everyone wishes to have that special someone to spend the holidays with.

You might even feel tired hoping and waiting for that special someone you can spend your life with but hey, the world is round and definitely there’s also someone out there waiting for you. Maybe your roads haven’t collided yet but for sure it will.

But love isn’t just the only thing grownup wishes for - though it is like 80% of our wish. Grownups also wish for a stable job, a stronger family and a healthier life. See? Everything’s not about love. ;)

In this chaotic world today, I’m pretty sure there are those hopeful souls who wish to have a better world to live upon. There have been a lot of massacres around the world, youth and mass killings. It’s just so sad to think what could be the life of the next generations will have. And that all we can do is pray and hope for the best for our kids’ future.

In the end, it wouldn’t really matter if our wish came true or not, thing is, we have another year to make our wishes come true, and another chance to find true happiness.

Happy Holidays! J

Does it really matter?

Have you ever tried dating younger men? Was the experience worth it? Well, I’m just kind of curious how it would be to go out with someone younger than you and seeing how people would look at you and even how they would think about you guys.

You know I’ve never been in the situation so it kinda amazes me how women still manages to go out with their boyfriends younger than them. Though it doesn’t really matter for as long as you’re both single, you both feel the same way to each other, and you both know you’re not hurting anyone. After all, love knows no boundaries right? A cliché we always hear when it comes to love and romance.

I just remembered a friend from junior high. She’s such a lovely lady, has a strong charisma, stunning and gorgeous, and to top it off? A professional lawyer from a prestigious law firm. She was a good friend indeed. She helps even when people can’t afford to pay her services. She’s just so amazing that a lot of men admires and courts her. But no one could win her heart.

After a few months of hanging out, we suddenly found out that she’s still into the dating period. And she was seen couple of times dating younger men. And we discovered as well that after hundred of dates she have had, she finally met someone she really liked. Someone younger than her. But is it really a big deal to be seen dating younger men? Sure hell, it wasn’t a bad thing. I mean, it’s her life, it’s her choice and she has the freedom to choose whoever her heart beats for. I just don’t understand how people can oftentimes be cruel to someone they don’t even know. They way people think and look at her once she’s out with her boyfriend, woow.

Can’t this world understand how strange love works? That once you’re struck with someone, even you yourself can no longer hold on to your feelings and you just wanted to let the whole world know how happy and lucky you are to have finally met that person who can stay right next to you in good and in bad times. Course we can’t expect everyone to understand how love can be so mysterious because not everyone had the chance to experience what really is it in “love” that makes two people crazy about each other. The least we can do is understand that when people are in love, they could be so dumb and stupid about it.

Find out who you really need!

Looking for a new fling or a serious relationship perhaps? Why not try dating younger men or older men twice your age? You might say like “duh”. But you’ll never know what’s beyond their power of charisma, right?

Most women prefer dating older men because of the thought that they are matured enough especially with serious topics like building a healthy relationship and family in the future that impresses women. Their capability of providing a secure life is a turn on which women can’t deny. Also the reality that they’ve been in too many relationships (if there are), makes them look more responsible and careful each time they choose a partner. But hey, we’re not just talking ‘bout age here. Older men also possess a reputable aura or let’s say, they just know how to carry themselves to catch women’s attention. If they’ve been into a lot of relationships, well, surely they know how to manage their selves regardless of the age they’re carrying.

But other women would prefer dating younger men. Why? I think it’s because younger men are more fun to be with, more adventurous, more experimenting. I don’t mean to say that older men are not - but in terms of age, yes, but in terms of experience and how they do it, both are equal. Thing here is, men regardless of their age, experiences, capability, they all know how to deal with their dates that could turn into a long lasting relationship. The only difference is how they do things in their own way.

So whether you’re looking for a serious relationship, a fling, a date, or purely someone who can be there for you to hang out with, be mindful of what you really want and how you want it. After all, you have all the options you need in this whole wide world. You just need to be wise enough to choose whoever you want to have fun with. Either with old men or young, fat or thin, genius or clumsy, single or not. It all boils down to what would make you happy at the end of the day.

Just don’t forget one thing though - time will come, you surely need to be with someone who can spend the days with you.

Appreciating the Twists of Life

Ever planned being single? No heartaches, no sleepless nights, and no crying yourself to sleep.

Living a single life is fun if that’s what you’re after. There are no limitations and boundaries. You can have all the freedom - to go out at night without worrying someone’s gonna fetch you up while you’re having fun, to wear anything you prefer without thinking “he’s” not gonna like it, too see and flirt with anyone you want. Having a single life gives you as much fun and excitement as you want. You are your priority. Looking beautiful each day isn’t gonna be a problem since no one’s around whom you’ll get conscious when you don’t look pretty at all.

But isn’t it wonderful if after a long day of fun, you’ll come home to someone who can give you more happiness and makes you feel complete? Someone who can be proud of anything you do and anything you wear. Someone who’ll be there to cheer you up when you can’t find happiness outside. And someone who’s gonna love and accept who you are and what you are.

This is the sad truth of having a single life - we can have all the fun we want, but at the end of the day, we’ll still find ourselves wanting to spend our life with someone who can be there for us when the fun’s over.

But, romance isn’t just the sole factor in everyone else’s lives. People can still live happily even if it means being single. We still have our friends and family. And the world is big enough to limit ourselves in the idea that love completes us. It’s just a matter of appreciating things we have and what we don’t have.